Cece is now in Nursery one day a week, I dropped her off for her first full day today and have to say I found it a little emotional. This is, I suppose, a very normal motherly feeling to have – I don’t know why it still surprises me that I experience all these things. I guess I still think of myself as a tough cookie, who would never be a soppy mum who can’t bear to be apart from her little one. However there are times, like today, when I realise I am a bit like that! I know I will miss her and I feel sad to be giving her to someone else.
Let me just say, there is nothing wrong with being a soppy parent, I just always thought, as someone who was not always sure they even wanted to even be a parent, this would not be me …. and then when I got pregnant I swore I would not end up as one who was overly soppy!
Luckily I think, actually I know, Cece will be fine being at nursery. While I will miss her and I do feel sad about leaving her at nursery, I am reassured that she will be fine and I have no need to add ‘worry’ to my list of emotions.
I have not been shy about leaving her with other people; when I was working in London I left her with my mum and occasionally a child minder. She sees grandparents every week and Jon and I have been away from her for many nights before. I know she will be her usual happy, confident, smiley self.
At groups, like Bluebird on a Monday, or at the church on Clarendon Villas she wonders around the room picking things up and taking them to other places, chattering to other children or even trying to join in with the bigger kids. Since she could crawl/walk she has been an independent little thing. What I love is that she will wander off and then after 20 minutes she will come and find me, put her arms up and demand she gets a hug; once on my lap she will stay for seconds then squirm to get down and continue on her merry way…it’s so cute.
It’s not only how she is that makes me feel OK, I am also happy with the nursery. In the end I choose Hopscotch, I looked at 3 different nurseries and while they were all nice, Hopscotch was that little bit better. There were a number of reasons, some practical, like it opened earlier and is a useful location but it also felt right. It was a lovely space, there were lots of nice toys and books and the outside space was clean and bright. There was AstroTurf rather than concrete and they had climbing frames, sandpits and colourful games painted on the ground. Other things that appealed included the staff, who were very friendly and also the fact they use biodegradable nappies, something I am very keen on.
At the settling in sessions they really paid attention to Cece. Instead of placing her in the group for her age, they moved her into the next group up as she is a good walker. Although she is by far the smallest person in the group I think she will excel with the slightly older children and am hoping it may even help her talk…an actual word rather than the (very cute) gobbledegook that she mutters now
Overall I know she will be fine, she will probably love the interaction with the other babies and will hopefully be exhausted by the end of the day. I am confident….but it can’t take away that slight feeling of nerves and sadness that she is not with me or another member of the family.